Canadian Shake-ups, NHL Observations

Whether you love or hate Brian Burke, you have to, at the very least, admire how seriously he takes winning.  The man wants to win.  Like, right now.

There are simply too many players involved in the Toronto/Calgary deals to congratulate a winner.  But Burke knows one thing – players that are good-but-not-great are easy to come by.  You need the difference-makers to win, and Phaneuf is definitely one of those.

This pic of Wendell is G

Toronto had nothing to build around when Burke got there, and the guy seems to be aware that nobody has ever won anything “by commitee” (the current codeword for “trying to win without talent”).  The Penguins win around Crosby/Malkin, the Red Wings win around Datsyuk/Zetterberg, so Burke is building around guys like Kessel/Phaneuf/Komisarek.  Not quite on the same level, but better than the cores of a few other teams (Havlat/….Kobasew?).

At least Toronto fans will have a few A- players (okay, B+) to cheer for while finishing out the year — for them, it’s been far too many winter months of cheering for a team of C+ guys without a Mats Sundin, Doug Gilmour or Wendell Clark.  (By the way, how insufferable will Toronto fans be if Burke manages to transform them into good…. which I suspect he will.  It’ll be like mixing crappy Flames fans with obnoxious Yankee fans.  Plus, about 55,000 people already have one foot on a bandwagon that would immediately collapse under the weight all the new “diehards”.)

By the way, worth mentioning – I think Matt Stajan is a really talented guy.  The Flames did well by themselves in picking up a quality depth scorer.  In fact, I think both teams made a smart move.

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I think DiPietro looks too bad on too many plays, too often right now.  I know he’s got rust to shake off; the guy hasn’t played goal in forever, but it looks worse than that.

I’m just really nervous about that big contract.  His numbers are fine, that’s not what stresses me.  I’m saying he just isn’t technically sound these days.  He doesn’t look balanced, his angles are suspect, he isn’t getting his pads flat post-to-post in the butterfly, and just doesn’t look like the old Ricky. 

Here’s to hopin’.

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Is Matt Duchene gonna be last years Steven Stamkos?  Just kill it the second half of the year and be a legit NHL stud by next year?  I say yes.

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If you’re the GM for Washington, don’t you go Brian Burke trying get a goalie for your team?  You can’t expect your guys to put up football numbers every night in playoffs, and those stupid, weak goals are just so disheartening.

Of all the stacked teams, San Jose really has the best total package right now (even though I like Chicago and Washington’s forwards better.  San Jose might have the best line in the NHL, but aren’t the best one through 12).  Nabokov is legit.

Happy February – it’s Superbowl week!  Your reward is an insider report on how TV news reports get made.

Brendan and Brian Burke. And Me.

Let’s hit the links.

Yesterday, ESPN’s John Buccigross posted the Brendan Burke story - as was to be expected, the article has been passed around on Twitter like  it’s running a five-on-three powerplay.  As a result, I’m back in the mix (“the mix”, being the 286 comments received on my gay slurs article for USA Today).

I did an email interview on the story for Yahoo! hockey blogger “Puck Daddy” (Greg Wyshynski).  You can check that out here.

Also, I responded via email to a Buccigross question – he’ll be running that response later today, and of course, that’ll be up on here when he puts it up.

For my Canadian readers, I’ll be going on CBC’s primetime show “Connect with Mark Kelley” if one of the Burke’s are unable to make it – that’s at five o’clock today.  All I can say is, I’m cut out for radio today, not TV.  I look like I got lost in the woods, found and drank some grain alcohol, fought Manny Pacquiao, then slept in a ditch.  In reality, I just haven’t shaved in a week and couldn’t sleep because of late-night rec hockey.  …and I may have had a Stella or two.

***AMENDED*** – Apparently, it IS for TV.  Five o’clock Arizona time on the CBC.  I just scraped a razor over my dumb face, and will be heading to the studio in a bit, if the CBC can track down a willing partner in this.

And again, I received further confirmation in my inbox today that, yes, I am indeed a “flaming homo”.  So… I’ve got that going for me.

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Since I’m receiving a bit of an influx in the ‘ol number-of-hits category today, I thought I’d direct some first-time Bourne’s Bloggers to a few things I wrote that managed to not suck.

*An inordinately serious column on leaving the game of hockey, for The Hockey News

*The “How I Met Your Mother” of Bourne’s Blog.  The story written for Islanders Point Blank on how I ended up engaged to Clark Gillies daughter, Brianna.

*And the story of how I ended up being a writer, for The Hockey News – I’m having trouble getting their site to work right now, so you can find it as the bottom article on this page.

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So that’s all you get today, friends.  Looking forward to more feedback, and when the ESPN bit gets posted, you’ll be the first to know.

…And The Dust Settles

Well… that was quite the ride, wasn’t it?  Man.

Did you read the comments section on USA Today?  I didn’t have the slightest clue that an article titled “It’s time to end the use of gay slurs in hockey” could spur nearly 300 comments from people basically saying “no… no it’s not.” 

Who knew gay rights was such a polarizing issue?  …wait… everyone?  Ah.  ….My bad.

My apologies to those of you who took the time to write me personal, tear-inducing emails, only to have me big-dog you with no response.  I’ll try to get to more of them today, but if I’m unable to, just know it was good to hear from the side that didn’t want me jammed between mushrooms and peppers and made into some sort of hate-kabob.

I have had some contact with some people in the hockey community who are openly gay as a result of this -- ESPN is picking up the major story that’s come of it, so I’ll link to that when it shows.

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So then, today’s blog is a dicey one.  I contemplated running excerpts from some of the great emails I received (one pointed me to this list of gay athletes.  Sheryl Swoopes?  …does writing about equality mean I can’t make fun of the WNBA now?  I’ll give it a few days).  Then I got worried about jtbourne.com becoming a super-serious website, so I thought about a throwback blog where I run pictures of kittens “nom”ing food, but I realized that might pour a splash or ten of fuel on the “Justin Bourne is gayer than Will and Grace” fire that was lit after my article dropped. 

Or haven't I...

I haven't had a role in years...

I was a bit stunned by the response at times, thinking …Me?  Run a serious website?  Keep in mind, it was here that I once speculated that the Pope Benedict XVI was actually John Ratzenberger (Cliff from Cheers) in character.  I thought by writing the piece I did, I was just running an observation that would make the majority of people go “…well, duh”.  It seems that wasn’t the case.

In conclusion, I think I’ve said my piece.  And I meant what I said.  I’m just glad that I may have advanced the conversation a tiny little bit, and I’m proud of so many of my readers.  The neat part, if you noticed, is that the USA Today comment board was littered with hate, while mine was soaked in compassion.  It’s with good cause that I love this website.

I don’t want anyone to think I’m shying away from the subject -- if you want to discuss it, I’m open to it.  But this is a sports blog, predominently hockey, so without further ado, lets talk about some goddamn hockey, please!

Oh wait -- one kitten picture first.

Yup, iz pikture time.

Okay, got that off my chest.  some puck thoughts:

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I had a friend make the pre-season prediction of forty for Stamkos.  I wasn’t sure what to think.  Doesn’t look so bad now, does it?

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but acting?

Maybe Phil hasn't missed games to injury...

Is it just me, or does Phil Kessel look like the guy who plays Phoebe’s brother in “Friends”?  You know the guy right?  Anyone?   Ahhh hell, here’s a picture —-->

I wonder if “Phoebe’s brother” has ever had his thinker re-wired by Matthias Ohlund?

‘

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I’d like to thank Carey Price for single-handed assasinating my fantasy hockey team.  Again Carey, thanks for that.

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I had a question posed by a reader than I’m unable to answer:  What do refs talk about between intermissions?  Are they targeting certain guys?  Justifying calls?  Discussing errors to “make up”?  Any refs out there care to handle that one?

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 And last, a joke from Tom, in Kelowna: “What do Mike Komisarek and Thunder Bay, Ontario have in common?   — They’ll both be minus 25 by Christmas”.  Awww, not funny Tom, Mike’s a great guy.  Okay, it’s a little funny.  Best of luck to him in turning it around, he’s clearly capable of it.

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As much as I can change the topic on my own blog, I’m looking forward to reading the emails I’m sure I’ll be continuing to get today -- I’ll respond as best I can.  Thanks for reading!

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(UPDATED) I had a fellow blogger send me this video today -- my teammate from last season with the Idaho Steelheads is having a great year in the Dallas system.  Skip to the 50 second mark and check out what Climie’s up to… (thanks bud. I’ll write a whole piece about how you deserve Turco’s spot and send it everywhere I can.  I’m sure they’ll listen)

(You’re all dying to make a joke about their living arrangement, but are too nervous after the past few entries, right? I sense it)

Swaggerin' Down The Highway To Hell

Alright, alright, I’m back in Kelowna.

Everytime I’m in New York I gain about nine pounds and take ninety minutes off my life.  Those people like the sauce.

Should we talk hockey, or me? 

Me?  If you insist.  (But then I’m gonna talk about hockey)

Major thank you to my Uncle Ken and Aunt Sue, who were a part of a weekend that went something like this:

First, the Broadway play “God of Carnage“.  James Gandolfini, Jeff Daniels, Marcia Harden (and some other great actress) tear up the set in a not so subtle hint that “marriage is the worst thing god can inflict on a person”.  Well timed. 

Meanwhile, my bride-to-be has recently started driving at ten-and-two just so she can stare at her ring while driving.  Which is nice, because I was feeling way too safe on the NY roads when she was looking at the road.

The play was followed by a fancy-pants dinner, a hotel in the city, a Yankees game in premier seats, and a 4th of July party.  I spent about six dollars.  I suspect others spent more (thanks, um, I’m a career blogger).

The only downside?

Someone made me hold a baby.

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In other news, Alexi freakin’ Kovalev signed with the Senators, bumping a Heatley return into the “unlikely” file, right next to the Sens playoff hopes.

And, to make matters worse for the Sens, all the sudden the Leafs have a legitimate d-corps with the signing of Beauchemin and Komisarek.  I realize Brian Burke is human sandpaper thats as well liked as Billy Buckner in Boston, but come on… that’s a pretty nice back end he slapped together.

(Huh.  That kinda sounded gay.)

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One more thing:  You know what we all need to think about more?  Our hypothetical at-bat song.

You know, the one the guys pick to play as they walk up to the plate in baseball?  It’s like, the real-life equivalent of WWF (still can’t say ”WWE”) entry songs.  It’s my new obsession.

I’m pretty sure right now I’d be steppin’ up to “Turn My Swag On” by Soulja Boy, strictly because it’s the worst good song I’ve heard since the stuff ”Ma$e” used to put out.

But what are some of the Yankees thinking?  Teixera steps up to “I Wanna Rock”?  Really Mark?  That’s the best song in the last 20 years?

I’m convinced Hideki Matsui doesn’t know what they’re gonna play, and it’s a running gag on the team.  They all get to pick the song for one of his at-bats per week, then they vote on who embarrassed him the most.  Just a theory.

At least A-Rod has a little “Public Service Announcement” by Jay-Z.  I can dig that.

In keeping with the entry song spirit, I’ve recieved some input, and we came up with the most important tune of all.  The one I walk down the aisle to, on my way to being married.

In the lead?

Highway to Hell.

Can anyone beat that??

*PS, let the record show, Bri has a great sense of humor about the slew of past and future anti-marriage jokes.  She’s the best.