Swaggerin' Down The Highway To Hell
Posted by jtbourne on July 6, 2009 · 15 Comments
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Alright, alright, I’m back in Kelowna.
Everytime I’m in New York I gain about nine pounds and take ninety minutes off my life. Those people like the sauce.
Should we talk hockey, or me?
Me? If you insist. (But then I’m gonna talk about hockey)
Major thank you to my Uncle Ken and Aunt Sue, who were a part of a weekend that went something like this:
First, the Broadway play “God of Carnage“. James Gandolfini, Jeff Daniels, Marcia Harden (and some other great actress) tear up the set in a not so subtle hint that “marriage is the worst thing god can inflict on a person”. Well timed.
Meanwhile, my bride-to-be has recently started driving at ten-and-two just so she can stare at her ring while driving. Which is nice, because I was feeling way too safe on the NY roads when she was looking at the road.
The play was followed by a fancy-pants dinner, a hotel in the city, a Yankees game in premier seats, and a 4th of July party. I spent about six dollars. I suspect others spent more (thanks, um, I’m a career blogger).
The only downside?
Someone made me hold a baby.
*****
In other news, Alexi freakin’ Kovalev signed with the Senators, bumping a Heatley return into the “unlikely” file, right next to the Sens playoff hopes.
And, to make matters worse for the Sens, all the sudden the Leafs have a legitimate d-corps with the signing of Beauchemin and Komisarek. I realize Brian Burke is human sandpaper thats as well liked as Billy Buckner in Boston, but come on… that’s a pretty nice back end he slapped together.
(Huh. That kinda sounded gay.)
*****
One more thing: You know what we all need to think about more? Our hypothetical at-bat song.
You know, the one the guys pick to play as they walk up to the plate in baseball? It’s like, the real-life equivalent of WWF (still can’t say ”WWE”) entry songs. It’s my new obsession.
I’m pretty sure right now I’d be steppin’ up to “Turn My Swag On” by Soulja Boy, strictly because it’s the worst good song I’ve heard since the stuff ”Ma$e” used to put out.
But what are some of the Yankees thinking? Teixera steps up to “I Wanna Rock”? Really Mark? That’s the best song in the last 20 years?
I’m convinced Hideki Matsui doesn’t know what they’re gonna play, and it’s a running gag on the team. They all get to pick the song for one of his at-bats per week, then they vote on who embarrassed him the most. Just a theory.
At least A-Rod has a little “Public Service Announcement” by Jay-Z. I can dig that.
In keeping with the entry song spirit, I’ve recieved some input, and we came up with the most important tune of all. The one I walk down the aisle to, on my way to being married.
In the lead?
Highway to Hell.
Can anyone beat that??
*PS, let the record show, Bri has a great sense of humor about the slew of past and future anti-marriage jokes. She’s the best.
I'm a hockey player turned writer. After playing for Alaska Anchorage in the WCHA (NCAA), I carried on with an NHL tryout (New York Islanders in 2007) before spending a couple seasons in the AHL/ECHL (last year was 2008-09). My father, Bob Bourne, won four Stanley Cups with the Islanders in the '80's, as did my fiancee's dad, Clark Gillies. I'm now the web editor for theScore's hockey blog "Backhand Shelf."
please tell me that was stunt double for the actual baby.
Highway to Hell? Well I hope Meatloaf’s “Paradise by the Dashboard Lights” will be yours and Bri’s first dance
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I see the Islanders made a few more signings (http://islanders.nhl.com/team/app/?service=page&page=NewsPage&articleid=433272) including Matt Moulson who had a few cups of coffee with the LA Kings. Moulson and Iggulden (Iggy) both played at Cornell and should be solid 3rd/4th liners. They know how to play both ends of the ice.
It was worse for the baby.
Wish I could. Don’t worry, I had her secured like MJ on a balcony.
Marking the 5th, 6th and 7th straight Isles signing of “guy’s I’ve never heard of”. I have heard of Moulson though. Funny story, really.
My first year of junior A, with the Vernon Vipers, he tried out for our team, and he was pretty damn good. In fact, he scored six goals in four exhibition games I think (four in one game). The problem was, we had an old-school, hard-nosed coach, and Moulson showed up the wrong way, everyday. Shiny button up shirts not buttoned very high, gold chain, slicked hair and sunglasses (indoors).
Someone tried to fight him for a couple straight games (before eventually jumping him) and Moulson hung on for dear life so hard he hurt his fingers. He was clearly good enough. Coach was disgusted, and cut him the next day. Thanks for comin’ out.
By the way, we won the BCHL title that year, and were probably one guy short of being National Champions. Nice personel move eh?
The Best Funny Wedding Dance Songs:
1. Bringing Sexy Back. So many great hilarious dance moves can be done with this song that it makes the top of the list!
2. The Macarana. Can’t go wrong with the Macarana!
3. Baby Got Back. This does not sound like one of the best but it really is! There are so many funny dance moves you can put into this song choice! It does look a bit strange if the bride is a tiny little thing with no butt.
4. Hammertime. Always a big hit!
5. Cotton Eyed Joe. A fun song at any wedding and very active!
6. Kung Fu Dancing. A terrific song that you can do so much with!
7. YMCA. A fun song anytime.
8. Ice Ice Baby. A cool fun song for your wedding!
9. I Feel Good. An upbeat fun song for your wedding dance.
10. Who Let the Dogs Out. Can’t beat this song selection!
Found this list kinda lame
Then I find it odd you chose to post it. It’s just gonna be a Bourne montage anyways: Bourne To Be Wild, Bourne in the USA, Bourne To Be Alive!
No shout out to the North Dakota boy from the Seattle airport? That’s it, I hope the Sioux and MTU Huskies kick the crap out of UAA for the next hundred years.
How about New York, New York by the one and only Sinatra. There’s a Dominican kid playing for the Hawks team here and he comes to bat to Soulja Boy – Superman. Seems like a mildly inappropriate song for a minor league/family friendly ball park. Maybe I’m just old. I used to come to bat to either Hip Hop Hooray – Naughty By Nature or So What ‘Cha Want – Beastie Boys in Babe Ruth summer baseball. I thought you’d like those. I’ll be in Ponoka, AB this weekend for Rallo’s wedding. I’ll tell Hayzee, Bomber, and the boys hi for you.
jl
Haha, those are both sick songs, especially the Beastie Boys jam. Even though you’re down to about six hours away, it’s still slightly out of hang-out range. Definitely say hi.
PS, I assume you know, as a Yankees fan, that New York, New York is reserved for a post-home game Yankees win. Might be a tad cocky to have it as your at-bat song.
Haha, hang on, I haven’t worked it in yet! Like UAA needs any more hexes against them!
Of course I know what they use New York, New York for. That’s why it should be your song.
jl
Hey JT,
How about “New York State of Mind”?
Hey J.T. How about “It’s the end of the world as we know it (but I feel fine)” by REM? Kinda says it all eh!
another one bites the dust for the wedding
And sports related, how about replacing that national anthem thing you norht americans do, by “fat bottomed girls”?