Lundqvist as Bond, Slam Dunks as Athletic FeatsShareThis
I’m now accepting votes for which sport has the worst highlight package. Specifically, which sport has the most redundant one.
I used to think it was baseball – diving catch, double play, home run. Home run, diving catch, double play.
But, I mean, basketball…. right? OH, HE SLAMS A DUNK! THE DUNK HAS BEEN SLAMMED!
THAT 6’7″ ATHLETE WITH A 40 INCH VERT AND THREE FOOT ARMS PUT THE BALL RIGHT INTO THAT TEN FOOT HIGH ORANGE CIRCLE! HIGHLIGHT OF THE NIGHT! NO, THE WEEK! THAAA DECAAAAADDDDDDDE!
I love me some Billy Guerin, but how will we ever know when he’s done being useful? I mean, he’s never going to lose that great shot of his, and 3/4ths of the time he’s on the ice with Malkin or Crosby. He could be effective until he’s a hundred with those linemates, so, that’s like, um, 27 more years of guaranteed effectiveness from the guy. Not a bad break at the end of your career.
It’s rare that an analyst will get worse as he gets more comfortable in front of the camera, but then, Kevin Weekes is a true pioneer in the field.
I know I tend to talk about the sports analysts I dislike rather then the ones I do (guys like Ron Mclean, Bob Cole/Harry Neale, Kenny Mayne, Scott Van Pelt, Johnny Miller, Chris Berman/Tom Jackson etc.), but come on. This guy is trying way too hard. I’m not sure who he’s trying to pattern himself after, but I have a hunch it’s Don Cherry. And that’s a sad, sad state of affairs (“Pay attention to this part right here, kids…”)
Describing the Coyotes play just now, he said “they really prevailed tonight”. God I hate him. After LaBarbera’s post-shootout win celebration, he went with ”I didn’t know he played the guitar!” This guy isn’t good for my blood pressure, or the wear and tear on my mute button.
So, is Henrik Lundqvist auditioning to be the next Bond in those “You are watching the NHL Network” ads? Why is he the only human in the NHL selected to do those ads in a suit? He should be selling cologne, or planning an art heist or something. Christ Henrik, even Brosnan didn’t take himself that seriously.
What are the odds Jason Spezza still plays with action figures alone in his room? They’re possibly Ninja Turtles, and he’s definitely making sound effects for the imaginary explosions.
It’s rarely okay for reporters and commentators to use the nicknames of players, simply because they don’t know them “like that”, so it comes off as sort of desperate. Dude interviewing Bobby Ryan asks him if he knew he needed to step up in “Getzy’s” absense.
Whatever that dudes relationship with the Ducks and “Getzy” may be, he only knows surface-Getzy. He wasn’t there the time he killed a hooker in Vegas, or the time he sent his twin brother on a date for him, or the summer he ate HGHios instead of the “Cheer” ones he eats now. Use his adult name, sir, this isn’t the locker room.
Happy Wednesness friends. It’s spend your IKEA/TARGET gift cards day at the Bourne compound. I’m thrilled. For those of you who didn’t catch my Hockey News column yesterday (on slightly crazers hockey parents), you can click those crazy coloured letters and your fancy internet machine oughtta take you right to it.
UPDATE: Canda’s Olympic team was named. I will now commence standing on guard for thee.