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FJM’ing Lambert’s Links



It’s time to revisit an old feature, the FJM’ing of Lambert’s Links.  Fun stuff.

Today we revisit it because he takes a shot at me, which is kinda fun.  I picked the Red Wings to finish 2nd in their division and fourth in the conference, and for that, I got harpooned. 

I’d defend myself, if it weren’t for this one awful reality: I picked Chicago to finish ahead of Detroit, both in the division and conference.  The other team?  San Jose.  Sigh….. ah well.

Without any further ado…..

FJM’ing Lambert’s Links – Check it out in it’s original format with pics and videos here.

What We Learned 

Anaheim Ducks: Andy Sutton(notes) hasn’t been playing the kind of hockey he’s wanted to this season, due to injuries and all around poor performances. Maybe he should consult an expert.

Lambert, I figured you of all people would’ve declared a moratorium on Andy Sutton Expert Jokes by now.  But to the larger point: Sutton is playing like Andy Sutton again.  It was bizarre when he wasn’t.

Atlanta Thrashers: The Thrashers have opened contract talks with a number of players, including Andrew Ladd(notes) and Dustin Byfuglien. Big Buff’s gonna get paid, and for a lot of years.

Yeah he is, and it’s gonna be like the CC Sabathia contract – worth it for a few years, then funny, because they’re both overweight guys who’ll probably try a little less hard to stay fit when they get Paid.  And I don’t think a less fit Dustin Byfuglien on D will not be worth millions of dollars per year.

Boston Bruins: Know what a good captain does after a tough OT loss to his team’s top rival, with the division lead on the line, and in which he was on the ice for all three goals against and got a 10-minute misconduct after it ended? Not talk to the media. Good work, Zdeno Chara. That’s leadership.

That’s interesting, and sort of out of character for him.  Not talking to the media is weird if it’s about the game, and not about having some problem with the media.  They doesn’t say you can’t be pissed about the game while you do your interview or anything, so stand there and be pissed. 

Buffalo Sabres: The Sabres are slowly improving, and they couldn’t be happier. “It’s huge, not only to cap off our first big road trip, and also we’re back at .500 here,” said Drew Stafford(notes), who is unaware that being 18-18-5 makes you five games under .500. 

…..I guess this is a Niagara Falls reference?  Man is that bad.

The Sabre

Calgary Flames: The Flames’ senior players are aware of the possibility they may get traded in the near future as the team considers a rebuild, but you can probably bet no one even remotely good gets shipped outta town this season, because they’re still operating under the laughable belief that they can make the playoffs.

Yeah, that is pretty laughable.  Look at the West Conference standings and try to figure out who’s not gonna make it.  When you play that game, Columbus appears to have zero hope.

Carolina Hurricanes: Jamie McBain(notes) is turning into an excellent defenseman for the Hurricanes, so that gives them a grand total of one.

If a guy plays d in the forest and nobody’s around to see it, did it ever happen?  Tell ya what – I’ll watch some of a Carolina game in the next few days and check him out, glad to hear they have somebody of interest aside from Staal.

Chicago Blackhawks: Through Friday night, the Blackhawks had allowed 32 power play goals, up from 39 all of last season. That’s really quite bad.

That is….I figure at some point, the Stanley Cup hangover is over, they’ll be back in game shape, remember how hard it is to win, and bear down.  I expect a solid second half from these clowns.   Also, Turco is ba-rutal.

Colorado Avalanche: The Avs scored twice in the opening 1:47 against the Islanders on Saturday, but then gave up three unanswered (all on the power play) before scoring with four seconds to go in regulation, then losing in overtime. Said Craig Anderson(notes) of the game-winner: “From what (backup goalie Peter Budaj(notes)) said, it hit our guy, off the crossbar and in. Not much you can do about that.” No word yet on what you can do about the other three.

Sad reality for my boy Nathan Lawson on Long Island: at his age, it’s a “you only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow” type situation, so here’s to hoping he kills it.  Sounds like DP is going to be out awhile, so I’m sure he’ll get a few shots during his time with the Isles.

Columbus Blue Jackets: Break out the tissues for Scott Arniell again. “Boooooo hooooo Rick Nash gets so many penalties that go uncalled this is the worst league. *stamps feet, crosses arms* They need to give him star treatment too this is sooooo unfair ughhh.” This is at least the 400th time this season he’s given that exact speech.

Rick Nash is awesome, I need him to play somewhere that he can have an effect on the NHL season, and NHL history.

Dallas Stars: Jamie Benn(notes) with a pretty okay goal.

 I’m too lazy to post it, so go read Lambert’s original article.  But it inspired today’s column by some guy name Me, so check that out at USA when it posts in an hour or two.

Detroit Red Wings: The Red Wings like where they’re at through 41 games. “We had a lot of people not picking us to do well,” Todd Bertuzzi(notes) said, “and I think that’s motivation for this team.” Fun fact: Exactly one moron on the Puck Daddy staff (coughJustinBournecough) picked someone other than Detroit to win the division or finish outside the top 3 in the West. What is Bert talking about? Hell, what was BOURNE talking about?

Hey, they finished 5th last year, Lidstrom was turning 41, the crew around Dats and Zetter aren’t that lovable (Helm/Abdelkaber/the corpse of Todd Bertuzzi etc), but I still figured they’d be good – 2nd in division 4th in conference isn’t exactly calling them dogs.

The bigger question is: WTF, San Jose?  The smaller question is: fuck you, Lambert.

Edmonton Oilers: Headline that’s three months early: “Sub-par Oilers hit the links.” Guys, it’s like you’re not even trying.

By far the most fun shitty team in the league to watch.  Fans of other bad teams should be jealous of this bad team.  And I hate the Oilers.

Florida Panthers: The Panthers are talking about an extension with Tomas Vokoun. Someone please explain why they’re not selling him at the deadline. Thanks.

Not sure what Tallon is cooking up with this team, but right now they appear to be in absolute shambles.

Los Angeles Kings: Now that Jack Johnson(notes) is locked up for seven years at ridiculous money, Drew Doughty’s(notes) gonna get bags of money dropped on his house from those planes that put out forest fires.

I thought that was funny.

Minnesota Wild: As of Sunday afternoon, the Wild are a playoff team. I don’t get it either.

If you had to guess a team’s payroll in under five seconds (NEWYORKISLANDERS, GO! Umm, 80 bucks?), I would miss the Wild’s on the low side by at least ten million dollars.  I cannot believe they’re a spend-to-the-cap team.  They’re Leafs-like, only not as awful.

Montreal Canadiens: Sweet shot by Max Pacioretty(notes) to win it in OT for the Habs.

 Again, go to the original piece for videos (link at top).  The Canadiens should trade for Zuccarello to keep the height jokes running strong.

It was Montreal’s first win of the year when they entered the third period with a deficit.

Nashville Predators: The Preds went out to the west coast and played Anaheim, LA and San Jose between Wednesday and Saturday. They won all three, outscoring their opponents 11-4, which is decent.

Hell of a road trip.  Non-Nashville fans: Name six players on the Predators.  I say six, cause I think five are easy.  After that it can be a challenge.  Yet they keep doin’ it.

New Jersey Devils: Marty Brodeur got his first start in eight days yesterday. Jacques Lemaire said he was on the right track. That’s because, by not playing, he could not continue to allow his GAA to balloon past 4.00.

Never in the history of me following hockey do I remember a team so widely picked to contend for the Cup be this bad.  I mean, historically bad – someone tweeted something about them being on pace for the lowest goals scored total since like, the expansion Thrashers inaugural year or something.  Whatever the tweet was, this team is just so bad, even before you compare it to expectations.

New York Islanders: Rick DiPietro didn’t play this weekend because he was in New York being evaluated by doctors. Shockingly, they now think his groin injury is somewhat serious. If you can believe it.

And I can.  Whatever.

New York Rangers: The Rangers won a shootout against Dallas on Friday, and it let me find out a wonderful stat.

Erik Christensen(notes) and Mats Zuccarello(notes) are a combined 5 for 5 in the shootout this season, and the rest of the team is a combined 0 for 14. Awesome stuff.

Especially bizarre when you think of guys like Gaborik and Frolov.

Ottawa Senators: A rumor I very, very badly hope is true: Pierre McGuire could be the next Sens GM. Not only would it be hilarious from an organizational standpoint, but it would also get him off TSN for a while. Win-win. Unless you’re a Sens fan.

I honestly don’t think a guy like him would do poorly, especially off the hop.  Eager to prove he can do it, he’d work super-hard.  And he’s watched a ton of hockey.  Half that stuff is luck anyway, so I’m sure he’d start out fine.

As for long-term, well, I think it could get ugly.  But it’s not like he’d take over and the team would implode.

Philadelphia Flyers: The Flyers have 57 points in 41 games this year, their best record at the half in 25 years. And one of these days they’ll figure out that whole No. 1 goalie situation too, I bet.

So, so frustrating.  I really feel bad for Flyers fans that they’ve wasted a decade of great teams.  Except that I don’t, because I don’t really like any Philly sports teams.

Phoenix Coyotes: Wojtek Wolski(notes)? Still kind of terrible.

The Coyotes division is pure madness.  Tied for last, one point out of third, three out of second.

Pittsburgh Penguins: Sid Crosby is doing nothing to dispel the notion that he will whine at the slightest provocation. Still bitching about the Steckel and Hedman hits. He shutting it down until he’s symptom-free.

Yeah, cause Sid brought that up unprovoked right?  He was asked a question and answered it with his opinion.  What a bitch.  Also, could you dim the lights for him?  Thanks, he has an actual concussion from really being hit in the head.

San Jose Sharks: Sick snipe by Jason Demers(notes) to win it for the Preds in San Jose.

Oh he’s on the Sharks? Ohhhh.

I think of Down Goes Brown and Bloge Salming every time someone shoots it in their own net now, which is awesome.

St. Louis Blues: TJ Oshie(notes) is still a ways out from being good to go. He broke his ankle on Nov. 10, and is still experiencing stiffness and range-of-motion issues.

This is a massive loss for the Blues, they need him.  He’s one of the reasons this team is sneaky good – look out if they get a decent seed in playoffs.

Tampa Bay Lightning: When Steve Yzerman took over as GM, he said fans could expect a slow but steady rebuild. Instead, the Bolts are 2nd in the Eastern Conference. So what gives? “There are nights where I go home and think, “You know, we’ve got a real good team here,’” Yzerman says. “And then you lose 8-1 and you wonder, ‘Are you sure you know what you’re doing?’”  

Yzerman is smart, composed, and reasonable.  You can’t eff up too badly, ever, with those qualities.

Toronto Maple Leafs: Best stat of the year to date: The Leafs pounded Atlanta 9-3 on Friday, and somehow Brett Lebda(notes) still finished the game minus-3

Now THAT’S a stat.  That’s one you know without looking at the scoresheet as you take your gear off at the end of the night.

Vancouver Canucks: Henrik Sedin(notes) on Daniel’s goal production so far this season: “If I would have myself passing to me, I would have 24 too.”

Haha, beauty quote.  His off-the-end-boards pass on Howard’s “save of the week” (also in original article) is mind-bogglingly good.

Washington Capitals: Beauty, vintage Ovechkin goal.

 Yep, totally agree wtih the comment below.  Dude’s about to get 10 in 6 games or something.

He’s gonna be doing a lot more of that in the near future, I figure.


15 Responses to “FJM’ing Lambert’s Links”
  1. Liviu Bird says:

    That whole play, with the Sedins trying to give the Rogers Arena boards an assist and Howard pulling the puck out of his ass on that save, was just delicious. Great hockey.

  2. Nadeau says:

    Easy on the canes man…. oh and I think they have one of the if not the most un talked about goalies in the league so he would be someone of intrest outside of Staal ;)

  3. Ralphie says:

    Yes Wolski has been struggling…. and was traded today to the NY Rangers for Michal Rozsival, a 32 year old 10 year veteran defenseman, which will help our struggling defense and clears a spot for us to bring up one of our talented forwards from the AHL, and unfortunately keep Biz as a floating healthy scratch. #boom

  4. neil says:

    McBain has a ton of potential, he became a staple on their back end last year almost within a week and he has another great window right now to do it again (so far he hasn’t exactly been blowing anyone away with his PP production but he’s getting the minutes). It’ll be interesting to see where he goes when they get Pitkanen back and healthy.

    “Yeah, cause Sid brought that up unprovoked right? He was asked a question and answered it with his opinion. What a bitch. Also, could you dim the lights for him? Thanks, he has an actual concussion from really being hit in the head.”

    Good call Bourne, I’m so, so, so tired of the Crosby hating. You know who’s way more whiney than Crosby? Crosby haters. And they don’t score anywhere near as many goals.

    Kevin Porter and Peter Mueller for Rozsival… I guess it depends on what happens with Mueller’s concussion problems, but this could work out nicely for the Coyotes, particularly if it turns out that Wolski doesn’t click on three different teams in two different conferences.

  5. andy says:

    re: Good work, Zdeno Chara. That’s leadership.

    i love how shortsighted sports fans are. its 1 game out of 82.
    as far as im concerned, leadership isnt measured by speaking to the media. its measured by what the guys in the room think about him. since none of us are in the room…

    its interesting that fans think they want wins more than players (see any post on hfboards). fans dont do any of the work that goes into playing in the show and they have the balls to think they can hold players and coaches ‘accountable’ for what happens on the ice. the only people who can hold a player accountable are the guys he plays with and for. as much as fans want to be involved in the game, they arent. no matter what they think. buying a ticket or a jersey doesnt get you on the team.

    its a damn game. no team, no matter how good, is going to win every game. yet fans expect them to. hell, i play 18-22 game seasons in beer leagues and we cant get it together every game. no matter how many former d1 or jr. a players we have. even the best teams (50s & 70s canadians, 80s islanders & oilers) lost games.

    shit drives me nuts.

  6. andy says:

    ps: george mcphee said it perfectly in 24/7, if they (media and fans) knew anything about the game, theyd be in it.

  7. SDC says:

    Lambert can go FJM himself.

  8. neil says:

    Andy: One of the coolest things about the 24/7 series, imho, was seeing how pissed teams were when they lost, and how crazy pumped they were when they won. The difference was huge, you either go to the dressing room shouting and cheering like you won the lottery, or you go in silence. What was even cooler was seeing Washington’s reaction to earning an OTL point during their losing streak. I figured they’d be somewhat happy for going to OT and getting the point, but as far as those guys were concerned, they may as well have lost 5-0. It made me realize, these guys care about winning WAY more than their fans. When my team gets an OTL point during a losing streak, I’ll thing “geez, at least we got a point”. You’re totally right, fans have no idea.

  9. Fish says:

    6 Predators players:

    Pekka Rinne, Steve Sullivan, Martin Erat, Colin Wilson, Ryan Suter and Shea Weber. Now, a seventh… euhm… No idea…

    Sidney Crosby hating, once you can do what he can do you can hate. Ooh, and I mean included the sticks and legs and hands he fights through to get to the puck.

    Canes Cam War is still a rrrrreally good goalie I think he’s on par with Miller.
    Wild a sending to the cap team? wow HAvlat and Koivu must be making some serious money colesely followed by Backstrom.

  10. Deirdre says:

    On the Sharks – sigh – but they pretty much do this every season (seriously sucking for a large portion of the first half) so I still have hopes (small, shy, baaarely surviving hopes, but hopes)

    On Crosby – it’s sort of an unwritten rule (at least in interviews) that you don’t call out another player for something that is questionable. The fact that Crosby answered with a unfiltered “it was a dirty hit and he should get suspended” makes him a whiner. If he’d answered with something like “I can’t know what he was thinking, but the end result was that I have a concussion” I would have had much more respect for his answer. Basically what his quote says is that he thinks he knows better than the league. Anytime a player calls out someone else specifically they get flack for it, don’t right this off to “the Crosby haters”.

  11. nightfly says:

    Heh. If I had any photoshop skills I’d swap the heads of my defensmen into the Bloge Salming video. That thing still makes me laugh coffee out of my nose whenever I see it. When the kids stand there with their mouths hanging open! Good times.

    PS – Love the new kitteh. Jiggs is a great cat name and if my wife weren’t allergic I’d be completely stealing the idea… I’d also get a second cat and name him Eddie. (I could name him Howie, but he doesn’t particularly care.)

  12. neil says:

    I find that players call out other players for dirty hits all the time. Not always, but when someone gets booked (like Savard, Booth, Havlat, etc.) there are usually a couple of guys who come out and say it was dirty, even when it wasn’t (like Kronwall on Havlat, Staal on Stajan). Babcock made it very clear he thought Kostopolous’s hit was really dirty. Beauchemin said Eager’s punch on Armstrong was bush league. That’s just two incident’s off the top of my head, from just the last three or four days. Remember when Guerin said he wasn’t a big fan of Matt Cooke’s hit on Savard? That was a guy on his own team. I don’t think the unspoken rule you mentioned exists, and if it does, plenty of players from different teams and age demographics have no problem breaking it. Personally, when somebody gives Crosby a hard time for doing something everyone else does, like calling him a whiner for making a comment that other players routinely make, I can’t help but put it into the category of Crosby hating. Why else would someone blast only one player for doing something tons of other players (and coaches, and GMs) routinely do?

  13. mikeb says:

    rumour in ottawa is pierre coming here… also that Dave Cameron is coming in to coach after the Memorial Cup regardless of who the GM wants.

  14. Char says:

    Regarding Chara “dodging” the media, in the five years he’s been the Bruins’ captain, he has not spoken to the media post-game exactly twice.

    In other news, Joe Haggerty, author of that article, is a self-important, egotistical asswipe.


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