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Fantasy Hockey Checkpoint



Happy holidays everyone!

I hear it’s been a tad, um, blustery out on the east coast.  Which sounds fun and all, but I ran in shorts and a t-shirt here this weekend…. so I’ll just go preemptively eff myself.  Thanks.


The old "having an edge" vs. "being an idiot" tightrope.

The old "having an edge" vs. "being an idiot" tightrope.

Did anybody else think the punch Barret Jackman snuck in on Alex Burrows last night was a bigger deal than the commentators made of it?  Judging by the lack of video of it online, I’m sure I’m over-reacting here, but I was hoping some Canucks or Blues fans saw the play and could shed some light on it.

Basically, it looked to me like Burrows crashed the Blues crease after the whistle, so Jackman snuck off his right glove to give him a solid suckerpunch to the lips.  It all happened so fast it looked pretty inconspicuous, but if that’s really what happened, that’s some vicious intent right there.  Maybe the league should give the play a quick once-over.



The Bourne’s Blog Hockey League has reached the halfway point.  Mile 13.1 of this marathon (week 11 of the regular season), people, and it’s time for a little review.

This is my first year playing fantasy hockey, and as I’ve mentioned before, I’m loving it.

I went with head-to-head as the format, because I figured that way it would stay interesting throughout the whole year.  Even if you’re getting shellacked, you can still play (and bet) against your opponent from the week to salvage some joy from the torture (I was looking out for MY best interests going into the season).  I’m sure some fantasy league are down to four or five players actually playing by the end of it, and nobody wants that (especially in our 20-team league).

The problems with the format are clear.  Some people *ahem* do really well statistically *ahem*, but have some bad luck in their matchups *A-HEM!* 

I’m sticking with my theory that the format becomes an elaborate game of “war” (the card game).  You can win with a seven if your opponent has a six, which is no more valuable than winning with an ace if you’re opponent has a two.  You just hope that eventually you get to play that ace you still hold at the right time.  And while I’m not-so-subtley masking my bitterness, I hate you all.

Kopitar - seen here 200 feet from contributing anything of value to my fantasy team.

Kopitar - seen here 200 feet from contributing anything of value to my fantasy team.

I’ve guaranteed that I will finished the year in the top five (I’m currently in FOURTEENTH of 20), and I’m not wavering from that.  My goalies are finally on the ball (I lost save percentage 2.23 to 2.22 last week thanks to Detroit pulling Howard against Dallas in the last couple minutes, apparently a few seconds too early), I’m close to getting healthy, and if I don’t start winning, I’ll just knock all the checkers off the board and declare that nobody won.  I am commish, after all.

Twice I’ve lost weeks where I’ve bet a temporary team-name-change, only to not hear from my opponent again (what, like I’m gonna seek you out?), and the two bets I have won have brought me much joy.

For next year, the Bourne’s Blog Fantasy League will be a pay league, where I’ll fly the winner out to hit a Coyotes game or two with me or something like that.  Whatever it is we decide, it’ll be a non-profit deal where you a-holes all have to pay attention to what your team is up to.

 So that’s where I’m at.  14th.  In a 20-team league. I have Datsyuk, Kopitar, Hossa, Stastny, Backes, J. Stall, Booth, Keith, Goligoski, and Kronwall, but can’t win.  So much for the advice I spew on an XM radio fantasy hockey show

I will now brace myself for the comment section of abuse.  Also, I will now prepare to deny the claims of the two teams who want to retroactively claim their “re-name Bourne’s team” prize. 

Hope the holidays are going great for everyone, my family is all here as of today for our first warm Christmas. (unfortunately exluding my Dad and Aunt who were unable to make it – boo - but including my brother who recently pump-faked us all on the whole “dying” thing then decided to just go back to being well by his 30th birthday.  So I’m pumped!)

 See ya tomorrow!


Tyson frequently sleeps on his back.  And no, that has nothing to do with my blog.  Happy holidays!

Tyson frequently sleeps on his back. And no, that has nothing to do with my blog.


The Gillies pup "Cash" on his one-year b'day. No, it's not a bear.

The Gillies pup "Cash" on his one-year b'day. And no, it's not a bear.

Merry... holidays, from the Bournes!

Merry... holidays, from the Bournes!


10 Responses to “Fantasy Hockey Checkpoint”
  1. jtbourne says:

    Hey, I lost, straight up! (I bet you’ve been saving that screen-shot for weeks!). But we agreed that the loser has to change his name for the next week! Had I won, the second the clock went to 12:00 a.m. Monday morning there’d have been an email in your inbox saying “You will now change your team name to ‘NotWorthBourne’sTime’” or something like that! You snoozed my friend…. (but on the upside, I think you earned 25% of your wins that week!)

  2. Pete says:

    i snoozed?

    i don’t believe (aaand i start backpedaling) i ever heard back from you on bet terms. i was asking for the bourne’s blog header for a day (which was not a picture of brian austin green staring out into a body of water.)

    no big deal.

    and i just figured out how to find those weekly results, dammit!

  3. PVeltkamp says:

    Regarding the bet I won. I sent an e-mail through the league the week after I won. You must not have received it. Our bet was until the new year… so there is still time left to fulfill your end of the bargain.

    Happy holidays anyways!

  4. jtbourne says:

    PVeltkamp – I didn’t get the email! Fire it over, or let me know what it said/what you want. I’ll humbly take my public humiliation!

  5. Frank says:

    Happy holidays to you and your family, Justin and all the other readers….and echoing your comment, I am looking FORWARD to wearing shorts the 4 days I’m in Houston…not to mention the sun rising before 10am….which reminds, me I need to find my sunglasses.

  6. Officer Koharski says:

    You had better hope I miss the signup next season because I’m laying waste in my pool this year. Granted some teams have been idle but I missed the draft and still managed to flip a bunch of useless players/waiver pickups into a solid roster. It’s pretty frustrating when people clamor to sign up and disappear a few weeks in, especially when they’ve had Parise on the bench for weeks and could easily hit ‘Accept Offer’ and fuck off for all I care.

    Are you in Yahoo or CBS? I have a team in both and I feel CBS is head and shoulders above Yahoo.

  7. PVeltkamp says:

    e-mail sent. it is from a hotmail account, hopefully it doesn’t go in the junk bin.

  8. Frank says:

    By the way, completely off topic….but does anyone else find it insulting that the Associated Press male “athlete” of the year for 2009 is a NASCAR driver?! Especially when you see the people he beat out for the award….including Roger Federer and Usain Bolt….

  9. Char says:

    Aaaaawwww such a cute kitteh! :-)

    No prob with running in shorts. I have no problem walking my dog in the snow (off leash in the park is heaven!); I love winter!

    Happiest of holidays, even if you don’t have snow. :-)

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