Subscribe to Bourne's Blog Grab My Feed!Subscribe to Bourne's Blog Subscribe to Comments

In Which I Don’t Address Kaberle Beyond A Sentence…. Um, And A Title



Crap, there’s a picture of Tomas in here too.  Sorry for the lies.


Its my personal goal to only use keypad for emails. Swype for texts.

If you haven’t been following my obnoxious ravings on twitter, I did end up getting that Droid 2 I was inquiring about.  Basically, I “wasn’t eligible for an upgrade” before cause I ran into that one crappy employee at every phone store everywhere.  But now…. Shazam!  I have the phone.  Also, the Shazam app.

I won’t bore you with too many of the details, but my god…. this thing is a GPS (getting a car mount for it), a Sky Caddie, an iPod (w/ Pandora), a social networking dream, a sports highlight machine, a disorganized persons organizer, and….  a cell phone.  

I Can Has Cheezburger is now constantly at my fingertips.  Productivity – ruined.  Social awkwardness evading capabilites – enhanced.  Sooo, just me and you on this elevator for 15 floors HEY OMG LOOK something is neat on my phone. Can’t show you what, but I’ll be looking down for the next minute because of it…


The newest Burke-hater.

Kaberle didn’t get traded – no, instead, he stayed a Maple Leaf in Toronto.  Je ne care pas.  This is my first summer as an official hockey writer guy, and my first thoughts on it are “this part sucks”.  MAD props (yep, I gave em) to writers that muster up such great work during this generally dull time of the sports year - Guys like Wyshynski, Mirtle and Elliotte Friedman, who stay crazy-readable over the course of the NASCAR-packed summer.

While we’re discussing media, I’m seeking reviews on a couple people (who kinda seem like polar opposites).  I haven’t really read or watched much from either, but both seem to be popular and relevant (and since I seem to have similar tastes to my readers, lets hear what you think).  Larry Brooks of the NY Post (I only know about the Torterella battle, and that it seems like some of his tweets were typed with a flamethrower) and Steve Dangle of…. Steve Dangle… up in T-Dot.

Do we likes?  Dislikes?  Does anybody wanna go for a beer at Christopher’s in Huntington this week?  What about the Off-Broadway Pub in Greenlawn?  I love that place.


OMG it’s almost hockey pool time! 

First and foremost, a confession – I still owe on a lost bet from last years finals, which if I haven’t mentioned lately, I was in.  Out of 20 teams.  You’re all idiots, I’m a genius, etc.

AHEM.  Anyway…. I owe a bottle of Crown Royal to my man Pat.  I still remember buddy.

"I volunteer for retina stealing duty."

This year it’s going to be a pay league, since last year’s league filled up in 4.8 miliseconds and had too many teams (and because I love gambling).  It’ll probably be similar to the same format with a few less squads, simply because I thought last year worked beautifully.  And, I might do two leagues to accomodate more people, blah blah blah I’ll let you know.  Likely in the $50 - $100 range with top 3 getting a little cash.  I won’t skim any either, unless I find a really awesome way to do it.  Like shutting down the blog and moving to Mexico with my $600 CASH, baby.

Also, if you play in my league and ignore your team for a seriously-extended period of time (like a week-long head-to-head matchup and beyond), your money goes towards buying and training something evil that flies (a Mr. Burns monkey?) to come hunt you down and steal your retinas.  I HATE that. I don’t remember who it was from last year, but if anyone does, single out that guy who’s neglect cost other people success, on my behalf.  Thanks.


Didn’t have time to FJM (or whatever you wanna call it) Ryan Lambert’s “What We Learned” this week (also, I plain forgot), but if you haven’t seen it yet, it can be read here.  I’ve grown to seriously enjoy his contributions.  Looking forward to calling him a colleague during the upcoming season.

Camera? Fine. Cell phones? IMPOSSIBLE.


Quick question:  Is it one of the world’s biggest scams that all phones aren’t waterproof yet?  I mean, they’ve had that technology since back when Mickey Rourke was handsome.  And how about the all-telling, warranty-voiding “red dot” feature that gets turned red by water, steam, fog, breath, heavy air or saying the word “wet”.  Mine is still fine 48 hours later, but I’ve never made it the full duration of a phone’s life without it changing at some point.  Nice hustle goin’ there.


When I return from New York on the 23rd, I plan to kick the hockey season off by doing some 2010-11 previews, starting with a couple video blogs like I did last year (in those, I claimed Montreal and St. Louis would make playoffs as eight-seeds – I was close).

In the meantime, follow me on Twitter, dude.  Get with the times!  By the way, shouldn’t we have an acronym for Monday?  Friday gets TGI (to the F), can’t we rock a FMI (to the M?).  That’s a “Fuck me, it’s….”



30 Responses to “In Which I Don’t Address Kaberle Beyond A Sentence…. Um, And A Title”
  1. AiH says:

    The Healthy Scratches are willing to donate a little money to the league’s elite.

  2. Kennedy says:

    Les Drunk Canadiens are always up for some fantasy hockey.

    Please name the Burns monkey Furious George. Best. Monkey. Name. Ever.

  3. jtbourne says:

    Lol at Furious George. Oh, I forgot to mention – folks that played last year and are okay with paying this year will be in before any newbies. Gonna have to do two leagues I would think!

  4. Danimal says:

    hockey pool time?! wooo. IN.

  5. Jack L. says:

    no love for dustin johnson and the pga yesterday? man he got robbed

  6. Alex O says:

    Hey as a owner of the First droid here are a couple of websites to go to once in a while. They will keep you up to date on all the good things an android phone will give you. They do a great job of reviewing and recomending new apps and new features/news/phones that come our way via Google or anybody else regarding Android powered phones.

    Note check out the NFL app from Verizon it was free last year. (games live to your phone…..) I dont know if it will be this year. Also THN has a great app and the NYTimes has a great app both free. The My Verizon app is great because unlimited data is not unlimited so once in a while you should check out how much data usage you are using. And hell yeah it would be awesome to get a Bourne’s blog app. Lots of techie blogs have them (endgaget for one)

    If you have any other questions (Ive become sort of a Droid geek) send me an email.

  7. Willc77 says:

    Welcome to the Android Army. Any particular reason you went with the Droid 2 over the Incredible?

  8. jtbourne says:

    WillC77 – Thanks dude, it’s amazing. Yeah, I went with the 2 for two reasons: Battery life (the biggie) and because it has a keypad, and Im sketchy to go all touch screen. I write a lot of lengthy business emails from my BB, and wasn’t sure if i’d enjoy going all touch.

    Biggest disappointment? It’s 1:47 and I’m already re-charging my phone from when I unplugged it this morning, despite getting the phone with better battery life. Any advice on that? I have a TaskKiller, but there has to be more I can do. When I look at what’s eating up my battery life, I assume all the and com.motorola.home things are essential? They’re KILLING me.

  9. Ralphie says:

    Long live iPhone! Haha can’t wait for the new seasons previews, poscasts and videos! Woohoo!

  10. PVeltkamp says:

    I have a pretty good feeling I would want to be back in on the pool this year.

  11. ms.conduct says:

    So Bourne’s league was my fave last year because it was so damn simple without the LW/C/RW distinction and no PIM, but I vowed to cut back this year because I couldn’t give any of my leagues the attention they deserved, plus I’m super cheap and don’t like to gamble more than pennies at a time, so there’s a spot for somebody. :)

    I like Dangle. If I were a Leafs fan, I’d LOVE Dangle, but I don’t watch all his stuff because I don’t much care about the Leafs. However, when he gets those figurines out and does his little skits and shit? OMG, I love that. No opinion on Brooks.

  12. Ballgame says:

    Don’t you people work? BV and Ginger and I’m in!

    Oh yeah what are we talking about?

    Just kidding. Sorta

  13. neil says:

    I’ll second ms.conduct’s thoughts, steve dangle is the shit and I don’t know much about Brooks (other than his reputation for being a bit of a wind-bag, but I haven’t read enough of his stuff to confirm/deny).

    Good call on adding some cash to the fantasy league, last year’s 2-3 no-shows were a bummer and the winners deserved something for winning. No PIMs was nice, and hopefully you can add some restrictions/limitations on goalies so d-bags can’t bench their goalies after one good start.

    What’s the difference between an Android and an iphone? Are the apps different? How many beaver pelts do they cost?

  14. jtbourne says:

    Neil – Thanks for the Dangle thoughts. I love his videos, meh on his twitter account. I’ll start following him more closely!

    The Droid is Verizon’s version of the iPhone, which is AT&T’s, and it’s amazing man. I dunno if the apps are different, but they’re easy, free and all customed to what you want. I traded bison and wildebeest hide for mine, so not sure. Exchange rates fluctuate between our villages.

  15. jtbourne says:

    I’d like to add an immediate amendment to my above comment – I actually looked into Steve Dangle stuff. Yup, it’s a whole bunch of awesome. Immediately going to try to contact him to do something. Maybe some publicity stunt/war or something. That’d be fun.

  16. Char says:

    I’m a Bruins fan and I LOVE Dangle. Especially when he gets all squeaky apoplectic about the Rask/Raycroft trade. ;-)

    Coming back from vacation sucks, especially when there’s still a month to go before hockey.

  17. Willc77 says:

    Well, I solved my battery life problem by buying a second charger to keep here at work lol Like you said, I got my phone at 3pm Day 1, fully charged it, took it off the charger before bed, and it was dead by 1pm on Day 2. And that was before I really had any apps on it. Since you have Android 2.2 OS (Froyo), task killers aren’t the big deal they were in older models… Froyo will kill apps itself after a period of non-use, but the Task Killer can do it right away. You should be using either Advanced Task Killer or Advanced Task Manager.

    Some general things would be to download a Battery Life widget, so you can see the exact % of life you have left. Also, have the GPS and WiFi widgets on one of your homescreens, and have them switched to off when you’re not in a place you want to use WiFi or using an app that needs GPS. Having them constantly on is death on battery. You can also adjust the screen brightness, that eats up a lot of memory.

    Besides that, its the downside of Android; multi-tasking means lots of battery usage. Also, if you haven’t already, download ESPN Scorecenter and Pandora Radio. They’re must haves.

  18. jtbourne says:

    WillC77 – I got Pandora and ESPN Scorecenter already, fak are they amazing. Couldn’t be happier with them. Have Advanced Task Killer too. I’ve taken to using Swype, but it seems that takes battery power too?

    Here’s my main question though: when would I ever use WiFi, since it’s on a 3G network and always online? Are you on Twitter or something or want something plugged in exchange for all this help? (A website or anything?)

  19. Willc77 says:

    Thanks for the offer, but I’m happy just to help out. I’ll be on Twitter sometime this week, its blocked at work so I never signed up but now with my Incredible I figure its time to dive in. Been researching the best Twitter app since theres a bazillion to choose from.

    As for the other stuff; I’m lucky to have ridiculous muscle memory, and I can actually type faster without using Swype, so I’m not sure of its actual effects, but it definitely will use more then just standard texting.

    Well, WiFi is faster, but at least for my home WiFi its barely noticeable vs. 3G. Its more for people who don’t have an unlimited data plan. Personally, I’d rather not bother toggling it on/off and always be on rather then get the slight increase in speed. Being on LI and working in NYC, I don’t have spotty 3G coverage. Don’t know how it is in AZ.

    Btw, other apps suggestions would be Evernote, as it could be helpful in your “mind dump” blogs, and Astrid is one of the best apps for making a to-do list in general.

  20. jtbourne says:

    Spanks – I’m currently using “remind me” for my all-important “oh shit, time to make that call i said I’d make” things, and just NotePad for my To Blog About File. I’ll have to check out Evernote, notepad kinda sucks. 3G here has been flawless so far (I’m right in Phoenix), and I’m headed to LI this weekend! Coverage for everyone!

  21. Danimal says:

    is the Droid available only on Verizon? Have Verizon now but leery of smartphones monthly plans/charges.

  22. matt says:

    I’m definitely in for losing some money in the pool. Was in a free one last year (I won, whoo!), but it really sucks when half the teams lose interest half way thru the season.

  23. matt says:

    Also, for any of those who live in Kelowna and looking to be apart of a new keeper pool, my roomie who’s a writer for the courier is starting one. Email me at if interested (justin- hope posting this here is cool)

  24. jtbourne says:

    Of course Gunner,no prob. Congrats on last year’s win!

  25. Rob says:

    I have a tip for the “red dot.” A few years ago I got my phone wet and the dot turned red. I knew I wouldn’t be able to get another one, so I figured what the hell I might as well try to remove the dot. After a quick attack of the tweezers the dot was off and I went to the store. The guy took the back off my phone and said, “You didn’t get this wet did you?” I said of course not and he said there’s usually a dot, but mine seemed to be missing. I walked out with a new phone in hand.

  26. Simone says:

    Not one for superfluous cursing, but I give whole-hearted approval to FMIM!!

  27. NF says:

    JB — great blog. Keep it coming. As for reviews on Brooks — I’m a Buffalo expat now living in NYC and I read a lot of hockey material. My faves are Mirtle, Duhatschek and Wyshinski, and I also like Friedman, Ovadia and Spector (and that new guy Bourne is a comer). I don’t like Brooks at all (or Kelley, but that’s a different story). I find Brooks to be a complete blowhard. He claims that he doesn’t want to inject himself into the story, but it usually ends up being mostly about him and how he can’t understand why the Rangers don’t do what he says. He also doesn’t know much about the rest of the NHL outside of the Rangers.

    He’s also completely on the side of the NHLPA whenever labor issues come up, which is fine, but he totally ignores ownership’s side of the issue and pretends that the owners are greedy SOBs who have a bottomless pit of money that they won’t share with the players.

    Just my 2 cents.

  28. AndrewJ says:

    I migrated to your blog from PuckDaddy – not to pad your ego, but far and away the best hockey perspective of the lot. The others write more as fans – you experience playing gives perspective. Loved your article on how the too many men on the ice penalty is almost always the fault of a forward.

    Anyway, never posted before, but the offer of a hockey pool was too much to resist. Wouldn’t want to bump a loyalist, but if you end up with room, I’d be interested.

    Brooks is fine, but a total homer for the Rangers. As a Rangers fan (a long suffering one, as if there’s any other kind). He’s been at it long enough that his sources seem pretty good.

    On the Wi-Fi issue, if you leave it on that will drain the battery as it searches for networks.

    I had to proofread this post for superfluous apostrophes. Found one. Your readers are a gramatically correct bunch, aren’t they?

  29. jtbourne says:

    AndrewJ – thanks for writing bud. My readers, while apparently grammatically anal, are usually decent humans. Ill let you know when the league get’s goin’g and we’ll set i’t u’p fro’m ther’e.

  30. Ray says:

    Great to see James Mirtle getting recognition somewhere other than in bars that I drink at. For a math/hockey nerd, he’s the best thing going next to CapGeek. His columns in the Globe and Mail are almost always thoughtful.

    And he roasted Don Cherry beautifully regarding the number of non-Canadian goaltenders in the NHL . . . not that Cherry cares, or even bothered to read it, as he proved on-air. But it’s nice to see journalists who write fact-based articles and look for context.

Speak Your Mind

Tell us what you're thinking...
and oh, if you want a pic to show with your comment, go get a gravatar!