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100 Pushups, Injury Anguish, and the Presidents Trophy



When I retired from hockey, I was PUMPED to not have to work out.  I knew I would want to, someday, but I needed some time where I didn’t have to shower three goddamn times a day.

I had always envied that about people not playing hockey – for the most part, you wake up, shower, and that’s it for the day.  You’re done.  Hockey players never get to do that.  Minimum two a day, and on game days, three (post-morning skate, post-nap wake-up shower, post-game).  You’re day has too many starts and stops.

So for my first summer out of the gym, I just enjoyed getting up, showering, and having a full day.  That formula, for those of us who consume like gluttons, equals gaining a bit of mass.  So, I’ve been making a committment to working out the past month or two - and by working out, I mean cardio, because I could care less about being jacked…. I just don’t want to have to buy all new clothes.

It is time, friends.

That said, it’s probably time I try to get some muscle tone again.  So, at the recommendation of Deadspin’s Drew Magary, I’m going to take up the program from 100 Push-ups (assuming my sterno-clavicular joint doesn’t get too angry – it doesn’t like when I lift too often, after the abuses it suffered.)  The goal being, obviously, to be able to do 100 consecutive pushups after seven weeks.

I’ll be doing the push-ups Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, and will be reporting progress the following days .  I took the first test yesterday (as many as you can, to fatigue) to see which program I’d be on, and busted out 38 (a far cry from the 80 I once did at an Islanders camp).  So here we go! 

Day 1:  38


Any other Isles fans out there as worried as me about them becoming the Montreal Expos?  Y’know, drafting well, developing talent, then trading those guys for picks once they’re ”ready”?  What’s the status of the Lighthouse project out there? I haven’t kept up on progress — lord knows Wang ain’t gonna pay to keep all these kids if the team’s future isn’t the one he envisioned.


It's no fun showing up to the rink everyday to workout and watch practice.

Can you imagine the mental anguish of being injured so badly you may never get to prove you’re worth the big contract you signed?  I know lots of you will joke that you’d take the big contract, but it must be a horrible feeling to be Rick DiPietro or Greg Oden, and to think – “If I got the chance to be a bust, and was one, I could handle this – but being called a bust after never physically getting the chance to play feels horrible.”  I definitely have sympathy for those guys.

I think Garth Snow has done a great job with the Islanders.  He’s in an Obama-like situation - digging the Islanders out of the mess made by the previous administration.  But still, there’s just too many uncertainties in life to ever sign an employee to 15 years.  Too much can happen to think you wouldn’t need a review after say, five, where you can say ”hey, nice work, let’s re-up your deal.”  It’s like my Arizona drivers license that expires in 2047.  Really? I don’t have to take a single eye test between now and when I’m 65?  That seems safe.


The NHL’s Presidents Trophy has an offensive bias.

Already seven 20-goal players (Green has 17)

Lets face it – if two teams come into a game lethargic, you can play smart defense and work less hard.  If your team scores mucker-style playoff goals, you need to have the throttle down to be effective (and you need some bounces).  So when you can’t be at that 100%, teams that have dangly skill guys (who are dangerous at half-speed) can still put enough pucks in the net to win.

And over the course of an 82 game season, plenty of games are played by two worn down teams.  Which is why, when you have the natural firepower of a Washington, you can score that extra goal or two without the extra effort, and collect your two points.  In the past, it hasn’t been that the Presidents Trophy winning team has the best team, they’ve just had the best skill guys.


Tampa Bay has the 8th best powerplay in the NHL, the leagues 5th, 6th, and 26th leading scorer, the number two overall draft pick from last year, and what should be good goaltending.  They’re currently three points ahead of Toronto, who hold the title “dead last in the Eastern Conference”.  Ooo, idea for who to replace Rick Tocchet with:  Amazingly, he’s still available — Barry.  Melrose.


16 Responses to “100 Pushups, Injury Anguish, and the Presidents Trophy”
  1. Steve C. says:

    The 100 push-up program worked for me…go for it!
    I got in great upper-body shape no matter what number I reached.

  2. jtbourne says:

    Yeah, I think the point is pretty obvious – it’s just them saying “push-ups are physically hard, and really good for you, so here’s some incentive to do a bunch of them. Oh, you only got to 60, but you’re in shape now? We’re shocked.”

  3. Cassie says:

    Ummm…. The Lightning have tried Barry Melrose. That didn’t work out very well. Any other ideas? We talk about that on our blog’s game thread sometimes, but no one knows for sure what coaches are available.

    Oh, and the major problem that the Lightning have – besides Tocchet – is Rick Wilson. Yeah, that defensive specialist thing isn’t working out so well. The defense has consistently been the train wreck that’s sunk that ship. It’s either no chemistry between the defensemen or bad coaching, and I think I’ll go with coaching for $200, Alex.

  4. Jake says:

    I did 20 push-ups the other night, after pushing back about 10 blasters. Felt good. :-)

  5. Koharski says:

    Man in high school, 30 push ups were minimum, the other day (after watching that Office episode) I barely squeezed out 25 before my belly started dipping, I’m really grossed out. My arms and shoulders are still good but my torso has turned into an atrophied gooey bag of weak, I’m going to start with the side planks and those 6 inch leg lifts.

    Do you do Yoga at all? My only experience has come from friends casually showing me but I learned enough poses that I can do some effectively. Feels awesome in the morning, stretching everything out. The Chair position can be brutal on your quads and calves.

    On the Islanders: I was optimistic for a while but lately it’s just looking shitty. I think a move to Queens is the most likely solution, Wang will never take the second rate development that the county is going to propose, it has to be worth it for him and nothing short of his own vision will be worthwhile in his eyes. Meanwhile, Queens, where he grew up and went to college, is straight up offering him everything he wanted at the Nassau site. I think it’s a great idea.

    Subway access, a huge monument park outside the doors, and being able to buddy up with the Mets for that “we’re also a pro team in New York” theme. Attendance will skyrocket. Offer Mets fans 50% off Isles tickets if they bring their Citi Field stub for a month. I think people should get behind the idea before the team winds up somewhere awful.

  6. Char says:

    Hold on – you take a shower after you NAP? Whatever happened to splashing your face with cold water?

  7. minnesotagirl71 says:

    Re yoga – try spending some time in the plank and chaturanga poses. Great upper body and core workers! Sometimes holding the poses steady for several slow inhale/exhale counts can feel harder than push ups. (Downard dog to plank to chatarunga to upward dog and back to downward dog is one of my favorite sequences.) I suggest taking a class or getting a good book/DVD – you can really damage your joints if you don’t have the correct alignment.

  8. Neil says:

    38? 38!?!?! From what I can tell on that website (which is sweet), that is approximately where I should be after about 6 weeks of training in a 7 week program. I emailed the guy about that and he said if you can already do 38 you should take a vegetarian cooking class instead.

  9. jtbourne says:

    Neil – the whole thing was thrown off today anyways. I couldn’t wait, so I started the program. As recommened by my starting point, I started on week 3, which ends in “Max (at least 20)”. By the time I got to that last segment, I almost died trying to do 20, so a bi-daily reporting of my status is futile. You never get to straight rip ‘em out after day one, you just slowly kill yourself to improve.

    Dude is right though…. If I wanted to get skinny, I’d stop drinking beer and stop eating dessert. The guy shouldn’t suck the fun out of my quest though… dick.

  10. jtbourne says:

    Also, I’d like to note that I’ve blocked all political responses to my ONE FREAKING SENTENCE about Obama/Garth Snow, cause apparently some people missed the fact that there’s politcal blogs and then there’s sports blogs. Go to the appropriate one to pick your daily argument.

  11. Neil says:

    haha I promise I didn’t email him. I can handle 3 days a week and when I tee up on a slapshot I’d like said slapshot to make it to the net with enough speed that the goalie can’t bare-hand it, so I’m gonna try that site/program out too.

    After seeing the responses you got for the comment about American nationalism, I read that line about Obama and thought “people are going to freak out about this”. I’m not surprised you’re getting flamed on that.

  12. Newb says:

    Exactly. Keep politics out of sports blogs. I’m all for that. I don’t read this blog to hear anyone talk about Politics…but if you’re going to take a swipe at things that people are passionate about you have to be ready to take the heat.

  13. 7th Woman says:

    Justin: I would have never thought of Garth in an Obama like situation. That was an excellent analogy. That being said, I think Garth can do a better job of digging than Barack. I don’t believe they will trade away the talent and will build for the future.

    Rick’s future is another story. Yes, you are so right about how the uncertainty is effecting him mentally. He is a fierce competitor and was a world class goalie. He’s not ready to give up on what he could have accomplished.

    The Lighthouse project? Everyone is waiting to hear what Kate Murray will propose in her scaled down version of the development. Expect a “Ha ha. No.” from the developers. This will be a long and arduous fight.

    Oh wait… it already has been.

  14. marshall22 says:

    Are you gonna hit on the Kesler hit on Morris pretty soon here? When I saw it all I could think of was What was Morris thinking? He clearly looks around, see’s Kesler, then turns himself around. Like what is the train of thought there? Kesler was really moving and I doubt could have stopped even if he tried…

  15. jtbourne says:

    Fair enough Newb – in your case, even though we disagree, you wrote with intelligence and respect. Just trying to stop a firestorm.

  16. Travelchic59 says:

    Justin, my big fear is that Garth turns into another Milbury and starts doing exactly what you wrote. Trading all the kids for picks so as not to have to pay them. Personally, I don’t trust Wang. I mean I feel for him to a certain extent with all the money he has lost over the years, but i also feel he made his own bed with dopey contracts to Yashin and DiPietro. Garth seems to have a plan and is sticking to it. I really hope the final outcome is a team that is truly competing for a Cup in 2 or 3 years.

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